Updated: May 3, 2021
"Something beautiful comes from solitude and darkness. Find your wings and fly. Find your way and go. But please know, everything you need is inside you, and who you need is beside you, either in person, in spirit, or by intention, even when you feel alone."
Last year at this time, I had gone a month without human contact. I was home alone, writing Isolation 101 posts, and posting videos for my friends on Facebook. This week last year, I lost my entire year’s income when my work contracts were simultaneously cancelled due to Covid restrictions.
For some reason, I was able to rise instead of folding.
I made a Cast Away parody video in my house with my cat and dog, and a Wilson ball I ordered on Amazon.
By early May, I launched my creative writing website , and my YouTube channel. The photo for this post was taken in an abandoned alley. I cried in my car right before the photo shoot because I learned a family member who had been in intensive care was being released from the hospital. They were tears of relief, but puffy eyes, and red face blotches are not ideal in photos.
When I got the proofs back I cried again. I didn’t think the pictures would turn out. So much doubt had grown inside me. How could a sad, isolated person, worried about much larger things, capture a decent picture? Yet, this was one we didn’t even use.
I’m sure there are lots of motivational quotes about getting up. I don’t actually know how I got up. Last week I fell again when my work contracts were once again cancelled, taking with them, yet again, all of my guaranteed income. It was like hitting a painful switch. In some ways life is the same, but things have changed.
I’ve worked hard to fortify. The circle of people I trust is smaller, but much stronger. My business is diversifying. I will being build it back up brick by solid brick.
My creative spark, something I have always worked hard at, but hid, is lit and blazing.
There are reasons I use a butterfly in my imagery. I’ve always chased butterflies. They represent what it means to be free. They also represent change. The ability to adapt, then fly. Something beautiful comes from solitude and darkness. Find your wings and fly. Find your way and go. But please know, everything you need is inside you, and who you need is beside you, either in person, in spirit, or by intention, even when you feel alone.
We can fly 🦋